Average customer rating:
- Wrong audio book sold.
- great business tool
- Great Insight, Good Tools
- Very good...
- Ignores conversational reality
|
Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High
Kerry Patterson ,
Joseph Grenny ,
Ron McMillan ,
Al Switzler , and
Stephen R. Covey
Manufacturer: McGraw-Hill
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Crucial Confrontations
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Book Description
The New York Times Bestseller!
Learn how to keep your cool and get the results you want when emotions flare.
When stakes are high, opinions vary, and emotions run strong, you have three choices: Avoid a crucial conversation and suffer the consequences; handle the conversation badly and suffer the consequences; or read Crucial Conversations and discover how to communicate best when it matters most. Crucial Conversations gives you the tools you need to step up to life's most difficult and important conversations, say what's on your mind, and achieve the positive resolutions you want. You'll learn how to:
- Prepare for high-impact situations with a six-minute mastery technique
- Make it safe to talk about almost anything
- Be persuasive, not abrasive
- Keep listening when others blow up or clam up
- Turn crucial conversations into the action and results you want
Whether they take place at work or at home, with your neighbors or your spouse, crucial conversations can have a profound impact on your career, your happiness, and your future. With the skills you learn in this book, you'll never have to worry about the outcome of a crucial conversation again.
Download Description
Crucial Conversations offers readers a proven seven-point strategy for achieving their goals in all those emotionally, psychologically, or legally charged situations that can arise in their professional and personal lives.
Customer Reviews:
Wrong audio book sold........2007-10-16
The seller had the wrong book down for sale. It would be easy to do since the author had a similar named book. I was very impressed with the quick response to correct the problem. They credited the whole amount back and said I can keep the book. It is great to see a trustworthy, reputable, seller out there today - doing the right thing. I would highly recommend doing business with this seller again.
great business tool.......2007-10-01
ordered 15 copies to distribute around our department... received rave reviews from everyone who read it.
Great Insight, Good Tools.......2007-09-21
Wow! It's amazing how often I see my friends, family and MYSELF in both examples and in the strategies (some good, some bad!).
This is a great book to come upon when one needs it. Obviously, some have been forced to read it by a boss... and I'm not so sure that the message gets across that way.
Does this book cure all of the social inequities of the workplace? Of course not - that's not what it even attempts to do!
Rather, it's a series of tools for enhancing communication and, for many of us, these tools are a surprising way of looking at all conversations - particularly the non-productive ones.
Do I recommend this book? 100%!!! Would I give it as a gift to someone who "needed" it? Maybe not. It's best found when the time is right, not forced on someone when the time is wrong.
Very good..........2007-09-18
Very good book for succesful managers, but also for amateurs interested in improving their communication skills. Of course, for some professionals that one may be "just another one".
Ignores conversational reality.......2007-09-06
Do we need a book to tell us that if we and/or our conversational partners are overly emotional or argumentative, create an uncomfortable or unsafe setting, clam up, will not listen, are incapable of adaptation or appreciating other views, or are not overly bright that chances for conversational success are greatly diminished. The author's message is that in the absence of these negativities, that basically free-flowing dialog where all the relevant information is brought into the open will result in effective communication. The emphasis in the book is within business organizations, in particular between employees and employers, although the ideas pertain to all other so-called high stakes conversations between various persons. However, the book absolutely fails to deal with conversational reality.
It is readily obvious that the authors are consultants to the business community (managers), because of their dismissal of the power differentials in the workplace. Their citing of a few brave employees who questioned or contradicted a top manager, serves merely to reinforce the hazards to employees for speaking out in the workplace. Of course, such non-controversial topics as safety, productivity, or where to have the company picnic can be broached. Fundamental topics such as policies, strategies, products, marketing, structures, or personnel are invariably off limits. If the authors wanted to be serious about conversations within businesses, they would propose democratic participation structures, where workers or their elected representatives could freely, without fear of retribution, address any and all issues, not just the safe ones. Bravery or putting one's job on the line would not be necessary.
It is hardly just within businesses where crucial conversations are prevented despite one's best efforts. Bureaucracies and other barriers are often initiated specifically to prevent conversations. Try talking to an insurance company about drug or treatment denial. Try talking to a sales person about a corporate product or service. Try getting through a telephone answering system only to be stonewalled by an "associate." Try talking to a doctor about treatments or, better yet, fees. Try talking to a department head about the nature or conduct of your education. The list is endless where most people do not have a chance of a meaningful or effective conversation.
This book is like so many other "blame the victim" notions. If you are not having good conversations, it must be because "you" don't have the right "tools" to converse. It can't be that the person you are talking to has the power to inflict damage or is within a structure where they can simply ignore you or dispense pabulum. A democracy is based above all on wide-ranging conversation among equal citizens with hopefully widely accepted resolutions. Maybe some day in the US we will try a form of democracy within all of our organizations in which "conversations" are not one-sided with the possibility of punishment for even speaking. Now there is an idea for the authors to grasp.
Amazon.com
This grandfather of all people-skills books was first published in 1937. It was an overnight hit, eventually selling 15 million copies. How to Win Friends and Influence People is just as useful today as it was when it was first published, because Dale Carnegie had an understanding of human nature that will never be outdated. Financial success, Carnegie believed, is due 15 percent to professional knowledge and 85 percent to "the ability to express ideas, to assume leadership, and to arouse enthusiasm among people." He teaches these skills through underlying principles of dealing with people so that they feel important and appreciated. He also emphasizes fundamental techniques for handling people without making them feel manipulated. Carnegie says you can make someone want to do what you want them to by seeing the situation from the other person's point of view and "arousing in the other person an eager want." You learn how to make people like you, win people over to your way of thinking, and change people without causing offense or arousing resentment. For instance, "let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers," and "talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person." Carnegie illustrates his points with anecdotes of historical figures, leaders of the business world, and everyday folks. --Joan Price
Book Description
YOU CAN GO AFTER THE JOB YOU WANT...AND GET IT! YOU CAN TAKE THE JOB YOU HAVE...AND IMPROVE IT! YOU CAN TAKE ANY SITUATION YOU'RE IN...AND MAKE IT WORK FOR YOU!
For more than sixty years the rock-solid, time-tested advice in this book has carried thousands of now famous people up the ladder of success in their business and personal lives.
Now this previously revised and updated bestseller is available in trade paperback for the first time to help you achieve your maximum potential throughout the next century! Learn:
* THREE FUNDAMENTAL TECHNIQUES IN HANDLING PEOPLE
* THE SIX WAYS TO MAKE PEOPLE LIKE YOU
* THE TWELVE WAYS TO WIN PEOPLE TO YOUR WAY OF THINKING
* THE NINE WAYS TO CHANGE PEOPLE WITHOUT AROUSING RESENTMENT
Customer Reviews:
wonderful.......2007-10-22
I recommend this book, it changes your way of thinking and it has also helped me in my marriage in many ways
Common sense isn't so common.......2007-10-22
This book could be summed up by using the tired cliche; "you catch more bees with honey than vinegar".
Apparently, that train of thought isn't common with some people, thus, even the need for books of this nature. As a refresher on basic people skills which candidly should have been learned as a child this book is outstanding.
However, one must remain cognizant that how one dealt with people 70 years ago is vastly different from today. People are a product of their environment which has changed tremendously over the years, hence people change and how you deal with them should as well.
Nevertheless, most basic people skills still apply, however, they are only equally as affective if all parties involved are playing by the same set of rules laid out in this book.
For example, if you spend the majority of your time seeing things from the other person's point of view and in return they do not take the time to see it from yours, how is that helping you? I see how it helps them, but not so much you.
That is the overall, problem with this book. All parties have to follow this brilliant plan in people skills for it to be "equally" affective which unfortunately, wont happen in most cases.
In conclusion, this book advocates being nice (letting the other person talk, seeing things from their point of view, never telling someone their wrong, etc.) However, to end my review with another cliche:
"nice guys finish last"
A great resource.......2007-10-18
this is a must for anyone interested in social behavior. Or have just ever wander what makes certain people tick.
Still works after 70 Years.......2007-10-17
This has been a standard for 70 years for good reason. It teaches basic interpersonal skills and good manners. It works especially well with introverts that need help with one-on-one relationships.
Its age would seem to be a negative, but it actually works as a positive. It reminds us that good people skills are not a fad; they are timeless and often neglected in today's educational system.
If you interact with people at all, this book is an essential part of your success in your interactions.
Wanna build your network - listen to Carnegie !.......2007-10-14
Winning friends and influencing people is not an easy thing. Are you gregarious? Do you want to be a networking juggernaut? You should listen to what Dale Carnegie says.
"Do you want to get the attention of others? Watch out what actors do in advertisements and movies". This is such a simple technique that we all fail to recognize in our day-to-day life. "Do more listening than talking" - hmm, another simple technique. Carnegie explains how you can win friends and influence people, with a lot of stories.
This book is a must-read for those who want to build their network.
Amazon.com
We've all been there: We know we must confront a coworker, store clerk, or friend about some especially sticky situation--and we know the encounter will be uncomfortable. So we repeatedly mull it over until we can no longer put it off, and then finally stumble through the confrontation. Difficult Conversations, by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen, offers advice for handling these unpleasant exchanges in a manner that accomplishes their objective and diminishes the possibility that anyone will be needlessly hurt. The authors, associated with Harvard Law School and the Harvard Project on Negotiation, show how such dialogues actually comprise three separate components: the "what happened" conversation (verbalizing what we believe really was said and done), the "feelings" conversation (communicating and acknowledging each party's emotional impact), and the "identity" conversation (expressing the situation's underlying personal meaning). The explanations and suggested improvements are, admittedly, somewhat complicated. And they certainly don't guarantee positive results. But if you honestly are interested in elevating your communication skills, this book will walk you through both mistakes and remedies in a way that will boost your confidence when such unavoidable clashes arise. --Howard Rothman
Book Description
Members of the Harvard Negotiation Project--which brought you the mega-bestseller Getting to YES--show you how to handle your most difficult conversations with confidence and skill.
Whether you're dealing with an underperforming employee, disagreeing with your spouse about money or child-rearing, negotiating with a difficult client, or simply saying "no," or "I'm sorry," or "I love you," we attempt or avoid difficult conversations every day. Based on fifteen years of research at the Harvard Negotiation Project, Difficult Conversations walks you through a step-by-step proven approach to having your toughest conversations with less stress and more success. You will learn:
how to start the conversation without defensiveness
why what is not said is as important as what is
ways of keeping and regaining your balance in the face of attacks and accusations
how to decipher the underlying structure of every difficult conversation
Filled with examples from everyday life, Difficult Conversations will help you on the job, at home, or out in the world. It is a book you will turn to again and again for advice, practical skills, and reassurance.
"Does this book deliver on [its] promise of an effective way through sticky situations, whether 'with your baby sitter or your biggest client'? It does."-- The New York Times
"These talented communicators blend a daunting array of disciplines into highly readable and practical advice."-- Booklist
"Brilliant. . . . I've already re-read most of it. I'm using it. What more could a reader ask?"-- Tom Peters
"Emotional Intelligence applied to life's tough moments."-- Daniel Goleman
Download Description
"What is a difficult conversation? Asking for a raise. Ending a relationship. Saying ""no"" to your boss or spouse. Confronting disrespectful behavior. Apologizing. Conversations we dread, and often handle clumsily as a result, are part of all our lives: in boardrooms and family rooms, across the negotiation table and the dinner table. Now, Difficult Conversations teaches us how to handle these dialogues with more success and less anxiety. How does it work? Based on fifteen years of research and consultations with thousands of people, Difficult Conversations pinpoints what works. The authors discovered that regardless of context, the same small but crucial errors are what trip us up--and a few key adjustments can make all the difference. * The role of emotions--ours and theirs * The impact of what is said and what is not said * Why admitting our mistakes will put us in a stronger position * The truth behind the myth that women are better at expressing their emotions than men * How to respond productively in the face of personal attacks Who is this for? Filled with examples from everyday life, Difficult Conversations is certain to be an instant and lasting classic for families, neighbors, bosses, employees, customers, tenants, landlords, psychologists, teachers, and more. Who are the authors? Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen teach at Harvard Law School and at the Harvard Negotiation Project. They have consulted to countless businesspeople, governments, organizations, and communities including all parties to the negotiations on constitutional transition in South Africa; school teachers in Medellin, Colombia; and community leaders and the police department in Springfield, Massachusetts. They lecture throughout the world and have written on negotiation, conflict resolution, and communication. Bruce Patton is co-author of Getting to Yes."
Customer Reviews:
Insightful guide to conversations without confrontation .......2007-10-22
You will face difficult conversations throughout your life, but now you can learn how to cope with them. This book provides a framework and various strategies for achieving better outcomes from hard exchanges. Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton and Sheila Heen use principles, illustrative stories and charts to teach you how to understand the components of challenging conversations, and how to prepare for them and transform them into something constructive. The language of the book is clear, insightful, concise and always helpful. You can use these principles in business, but the stories also concern relationships in your everyday life. We say everyone from teenagers to mature adults can use the communication skills discussed in this wise book.
Will you ever have a hard conversation? Sure, you will! Read this book first........2007-09-21
This little book can be a great help. We all have avoided conversations we knew were going to be difficult. Often not talking made things worse, so as things became intolerable we had the discussion and things got even worse. These authors break down the inner structure of difficult conversations and how we often mishandle them. They then show us the ways in which we can turn this into a constructive process that brings more understanding, greater cooperation, and learning that will help avoid repeating the difficulties in the future.
Certainly, I can't recap the whole book in this little review, but I especially like their concept of three conversations happening within each difficult conversation. They are the debate over what happened, the feelings conversation, and the identity issues. In the what happened conversation the problem is that each side assumes it knows the truth, that they know the other party's intentions, and that they know where and how to assign blame. Of course, all this is a fiction and a waste of time. It does nothing to fix the situation or improve the process to avoid the problem in the future. The book then shows you how to have a constructive approach to the same problem. Excellent stuff!
The authors are part of the Harvard Negotiation Project and has a foreword by one of the authors of the famous book, "Getting to Yes". The book is concise, but full of very good information. I recommend it very much.
Reviewed by Craig Matteson - Ann Arbor, MI
Difficult converations.......2007-09-17
this book is well worth the read,
it is easy to get throught, and does not repeat itself.
You want to read the whole book.
nancy carlson
great read.......2007-08-27
This book is used as a textbook at the Harvard MBA. Good tool for those messy conflicts
Best Book on Communication.......2007-08-24
This is the most useful and comprehensive compendium of effective, research validated, communication concepts I have ever seen in one book. Useful for anyone who speaks with other humans, especially significant others, business colleagues and teenagers. If you are a coach, this reading is required. Difficult ideas presented in a way that makes them easy to understand and easy to apply.
Amazon.com
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk is an excellent communication tool kit based on a series of workshops developed by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish. Faber and Mazlish (coauthors of Siblings Without Rivalry) provide a step-by-step approach to improving relationships in your house. The "Reminder" pages, helpful cartoon illustrations, and excellent exercises will improve your ability as a parent to talk and problem-solve with your children. The book can be used alone or in parenting groups, and the solid tools provided are appropriate for kids of all ages.
Book Description
You Can Stop Fighting With Your Chidren!
Here is the bestselling book that will give you the know–how you need to be more effective with your children and more supportive of yourself. Enthusiastically praised by parents and professionals around the world, the down–to–earth, respectful approach of Faber and Mazlish makes relationships with children of all ages less stressful and more rewarding.
Their methods of communication, illustrated with delightful cartoons showing the skills in action, offer innovative ways to solve common problems.
Customer Reviews:
THIS BOOK WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE - AMAZING COMMUNICATION SKILLS .......2007-10-14
THIS BOOK CHANGED MY LIFE AND THE LIVES OF EVERY ONE I LOVE!!!!
IT IS EASY TO READ AND EASY TO USE THEIR SUGGESTIONS FOR A HUGE CHANGE IN RELATIONSHIPS.
IT IS A MUST READ - NOT JUST FOR PARENTS - THE PROACTIVE, POSITIVE WAY TO COMMUNICATE IS USEFUL IN ALL RELATIONSHIPS. THEY DO A VERY GOOD JOB OF TEACHING ACTIVE LISTENING.
EASY READ !!!!
MUST READ!!!!
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!!!
THE WORLD WOULD BE BETTER PLACE IF EVERYONE READ THIS BOOK!!
A True Fundamental.......2007-10-14
My mom pretty much raised my brother and me according to this book, and I give it most of the credit for how good our relationships remain to this day. When I was in college for my Teacher's Certificate, I got myself a copy and found it more useful than any of my textbooks.
Yes, it's got cartoonish drawings. Yes, sometimes things are presented in a somewhat simplistic fashion. That's because this is a book to be used with your kids, not just from your end. Go through it, do the exercises, and then do them with your kids. You'll be amazed at the difference it will make in your approach to conflicts.
Not just conflicts with kids, either. Pretty much all of the techniques in this book can be applied to any conflict situation with good results.
ONE GREAT PARENTING BOOK.......2007-09-30
I learned many ways of listening to my children, making them talk, very helpful in many ways. One great parenting book. A MUST HAVE FOR MOMS and DADS!! My husband read too and helped him to see a whole new way of managing trantuns and every day circunstances with the children.
There are better books on the market on this topic.......2007-09-25
This book has a lot of little cartoon drawings which I personally find annoying in a book geared towards adults. In the book and the cartoon drawings there are many sample conversations of what a parent should say and then how the child will respond. Most of the cartoon scenarios depict best case results, with the children positively responding when the parents use the tactics suggested in the book. I can see where some parents might like this book and some children might respond positively. However, I think it seems a bit naive on the part of the authors to assume that all children will respond exactly as they predict based on being talked to in a certain way. I agree with another reviewer that said the content and drawings were kind of cheesy.
I find the number of recent glowing, over the top reviews that pushed my review down the page interesting since this book has already been out several years, and I've noticed it for sale at a book close out store. Many of the other reviews read a bit more like advertisements to me than actual, unbiased book reviews.
Instead of buying this book I would recommend the book Assertive Discipline by Lee Canter and Marlene Canter. It is much more professionally written, geared towards adult readers and I suspect the ideas in that book would be more applicable to a wider variety of children's personality types.
Such a BIG difference in my family!.......2007-08-16
Wow I thought I was an encouraging loving mother until I read this book, there are all kinds of little things I was doing that were kind of undermined my kids self esteem and confidence! What a shocker for me! I have also read How To Talk So Kids Can Learn, another EXCELLENT book. That book was the beginning of a much more positive homeschool situation and excelled learning!!! Both books have transformed me from a frazzled tired Mom to a much less stressed one, knowing simple ways to make a difference in my kids lives...the best part is that the more confident and happy the kids are (and the happier I am from not being so overwhelmed) the better they behave daily! I checked the book out from the library but am going to buy a copy of my own to keep and share!!! I wish every parent and teacher could read this book!
Book Description
Do you want to get ahead in life?
Climb the ladder to personal success?
The secret, master networker Keith Ferrazzi claims, is in reaching out to other people. As Ferrazzi discovered early in life, what distinguishes highly successful people from everyone else is the way they use the power of relationships—so that everyone wins.
In Never Eat Alone, Ferrazzi lays out the specific steps—and inner mindset—he uses to reach out to connect with the thousands of colleagues, friends, and associates on his Rolodex, people he has helped and who have helped him.
The son of a small-town steelworker and a cleaning lady, Ferrazzi first used his remarkable ability to connect with others to pave the way to a scholarship at Yale, a Harvard MBA, and several top executive posts. Not yet out of his thirties, he developed a network of relationships that stretched from Washington’s corridors of power to Hollywood’s A-list, leading to him being named one of Crain’s 40 Under 40 and selected as a Global Leader for Tomorrow by the Davos World Economic Forum.
Ferrazzi's form of connecting to the world around him is based on generosity, helping friends connect with other friends. Ferrazzi distinguishes genuine relationship-building from the crude, desperate glad-handling usually associated with “networking.” He then distills his system of reaching out to people into practical, proven principles. Among them:
Don’t keep score: It’s never simply about getting what you want. It’s about getting what you want and making sure that the people who are important to you get what they want, too.
“Ping” constantly: The Ins and Outs of reaching out to those in your circle of contacts all the time—not just when you need something.
Never eat alone: The dynamics of status are the same whether you’re working at a corporation or attending a society event— “invisibility” is a fate worse than failure.
In the course of the book, Ferrazzi outlines the timeless strategies shared by the world’s most connected individuals, from Katherine Graham to Bill Clinton, Vernon Jordan to the Dalai Lama.
Chock full of specific advice on handling rejection, getting past gatekeepers, becoming a “conference commando,” and more, Never Eat Alone is destined to take its place alongside How to Win Friends and Influence People as an inspirational classic.
Download Description
Do you want to get ahead in life?
Climb the ladder to personal success?
The secret, master networker Keith Ferrazzi claims, is in reaching out to other people. As Ferrazzi discovered early in life, what distinguishes highly successful people from everyone else is the way they use the power of relationships–so that everyone wins.
In Never Eat Alone, Ferrazzi lays out the specific steps–and inner mindset–he uses to reach out to connect with the thousands of colleagues, friends, and associates on his Rolodex, people he has helped and who have helped him.
The son of a small–town steelworker and a cleaning lady, Ferrazzi first used his remarkable ability to connect with others to pave the way to a scholarship at Yale, a Harvard MBA, and several top executive posts. Not yet out of his thirties, he developed a network of relationships that stretched from Washington’s corridors of power to Hollywood’s A–list, leading to him being named one of Crain’s 40 Under 40 and selected as a Global Leader for Tomorrow by the Davos World Economic Forum.
Ferrazzi’s form of connecting to the world around him is based on generosity, helping friends connect with other friends. Ferrazzi distinguishes genuine relationship–building from the crude, desperate glad–handling usually associated with “networking.” He then distills his system of reaching out to people into practical, proven principles. Among them:
Don’t keep score: It’s never simply about getting what you want. It’s about getting what you want and making sure that the people who are important to you get what they want, too.
“Ping” constantly: The Ins and Outs of reaching out to those in your circle of contacts all the time–not just when you need something.
Never eat alone: The dynamics of status are the same whether you’re working at a corporation or attending a society event&mdash “invisibility” is a fate worse than failure.
In the course of the book, Ferrazzi outlines the timeless strategies shared by the world’s most connected individuals, from Katherine Graham to Bill Clinton, Vernon Jordan to the Dalai Lama.
Chock full of specific advice on handling rejection, getting past gatekeepers, becoming a “conference commando,” and more, Never Eat Alone is destined to take its place alongside How to Win Friends and Influence People as an inspirational classic.
Customer Reviews:
Never Eat Alone .......2007-10-20
Never Eat Alone is not your typical business manual. By following the author's strategies you will not only grow your business but will profit in your personal relationships as well. It is truly life altering. So many books are written on how to be successful and using people to gain that level of success. This book focuses on relationships and how building on those relationships, success will follow. Get your pen and paper out, this book has so many practical tips that you'll want to read them over and over. Katherine Burger RN,C CWS Supervisor Outpatient Services Ocala Regional Medical Center
Simple, but good advice.......2007-10-17
The advice presented in this book is quite simple and nothing is really new. Don't expect any advice based on the academic writing on social networks. Still I liked the style of writing and good practical examples. The key problem is naturally to implement the author's advice. He has for instance great advice on dinner parties, but the key difficulty is to get moving and doing it. In this regard, a book cannot really do much. Still, this book makes it as easy as possible.
Not impressed.......2007-10-15
This stuff put into practice would spread your network to thin and you wouldn't make real friends with anybody. I didn't gain anything from reading this book.
too basic.......2007-10-14
some good ideas but would expect a book like this to sell for $4.00 to $6.00. Here is the gist of the book: middle class childhood and was able to get into Yale where he met people, became friends and kept in touch with. Guess what, he was able to tap the network and help himself... wow who knew? So, if you are going to a City college you might no be meeting the "right" people. Seriously, for those with no clue about being social, this book may help them. Marketing can be learned... many of us (even experienced markeing people) at time can be a wall flower. Don't fret, just follow up and talk about things other than work.... kids, pets, sports, etc.
Be a better connector.......2007-10-14
Your don't have to be a super-connector like Ferrazzi to be a better connector in your own life. I took away some useful perspectives that I am starting to incorporate into my own routines. For instance, this book helped me recognize the potential value that lies hidden in my own Outlook address book.
I have begun to turn the regrets I felt for not keeping in touch into actions. "Never Eat Alone" is not only a great title for this book, but also a concept that helps to remind me of the simple opportunities available on a daily basis to better connect with the people around me.
Average customer rating:
- Textbook
- Careful...
- Great bookq
- Misleading Title
- not the actual book
|
Looking Out, Looking In (with CD-ROM and InfoTrac) (Wadsworth Series in Communication Studies)
Ronald B. Adler ,
Russell F. Proctor II , and
Neil Towne
Manufacturer: Wadsworth Publishing
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Binding: Hardcover
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| Qualifying Textbooks - Fall 2007
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ASIN: 0534636284 |
Book Description
Used by more than a million readers, LOOKING OUT, LOOKING IN has been the leading interpersonal communication text for almost 30 years. Written in a reader-friendly voice that links scholarship to students' everyday lives, this popular text motivates students to improve their interpersonal skills and sharpen their critical understanding of the process of communication. Through thoughtful, diverse examples that include fine art, music, poetry, film, and more, students can consistently see the importance of interpersonal communication and how it affects their society and their lives.
Customer Reviews:
Textbook.......2007-03-03
It has a clear organization, and interesting insets. For a textbook, it intrigues. The comic inserts are a tip of the hat to culture, and everything is up-to-date.
Careful..........2007-02-24
This is an okay book for note taking and has a lot of the terms identified, but please note THIS IS NOT THE TEXT BOOK!!! I'm not sure whose fault it was but when I went to buy it it only stated the tilte and cover of the textbook. I had to go back and buy the book elsewhere. Please be careful! As for the book itself it is a thin paperback notebook with key tearms (arbitrary as well as book terms) on the left side and a blank sheet to write notes on the left. The terms are pretty well chosen and helped me on a test. If this is all you want then get it but once agian be careful.
Great bookq.......2007-02-17
I love the book. I am using it for a communication class I am taking and it is extremely helpful and easy to read. It uses today's terminology and is very up to date in regards to examples used and the way that its worded. It is a great book to learn a lot about communication that we don't necessarily learn from day to day interaction.
Misleading Title.......2007-01-19
Was very disappointed when I received 'Cram101 Textbook Outlines' to accompany "Looking Out Looking In". I thought I had ordered the book "Looking Out Looking In". Very misleading when purchasing this. I don't know if something was listed wrong or not, but when ordering I usually type in the ISB # to find the book I need. Somehow I got the Looking Out... Textbook Outlines.
not the actual book.......2007-01-19
This is the Cram101 textbook outline, not the actual book. I was unpleasantly surprised by this when I received it in the mail after paying to have it expedited. The title that amazon puts is misleading, even the other customer reviews are misleading. The only place that mentions Cram101 is the publishers review - which I found only after I got this worthless book.
Book Description
The authors of the New York Times bestseller Crucial Conversations show you how to achieve personal, team, and organizational success by healing broken promises, resolving violated expectations, and influencing good behavior
Discover skills to resolve touchy, controversial, and complex issues at work and at home--now available in this follow-up to the internationally popular Crucial Conversations.
Behind the problems that routinely plague organizations and families, you'll find individuals who are either unwilling or unable to deal with failed promises. Others have broken rules, missed deadlines, failed to live up to commitments, or just plain behaved badly--and nobody steps up to the issue. Or they do, but do a lousy job and create a whole new set of problems. Accountability suffers and new problems spring up. New research demonstrates that these disappointments aren't just irritating, they're costly--sapping organizational performance by twenty to fifty percent and accounting for up to ninety percent of divorces.
Crucial Confrontations teaches skills drawn from 10,000 hours of real-life observations to increase confidence in facing issues like:
- An employee speaks to you in an insulting tone that crosses the line between sarcasm and insubordination. Now what?
- Your boss just committed you to a deadline you know you can't meet--and not-so-subtly hinted he doesn't want to hear complaints about it.
- Your son walks through the door sporting colorful new body art that raises your blood pressure by forty points. Speak now, pay later.
- An accountant wonders how to step up to a client who is violating the law. Can you spell unemployment?
- Family members fret over how to tell granddad that he should no longer drive his car. This is going to get ugly.
- A nurse worries about what to say to an abusive physician. She quickly remembers "how things work around here" and decides not to say anything.
Everyone knows how to run for cover, or if adequately provoked, step up to these confrontations in a way that causes a real ruckus. That we have down pat. Crucial Confrontations teaches you how to deal with violated expectations in a way that solves the problem at hand, and doesn't harm the relationship--and in fact, even strengthens it.
Crucial Confrontations borrows from twenty years of research involving two groups. More than 25,000 people helped the authors identify those who were most influential during crucial confrontations. They spent 10,000 hours watching these people, documented what they saw, and then trained and tested with more than 300,000 people. Second, they measured the impact of crucial confrontations improvements on organizational and team performance--the results were immediate and sustainable: twenty to fifty percent improvements in measurable performance.
Download Description
The authors of the New York Times bestseller Crucial Conversations show you how to achieve personal, team, and organizational success by healing broken promises, resolving violated expectations, and influencing bad behavior
Discover skills to resolve touchy, controversial, and complex issues at work and at home--now available in this follow-up to the internationally popular Crucial Conversations.
Behind the problems that routinely plague organizations and families, youll find individuals who are either unwilling or unable to deal with failed promises. Others have broken rules, missed deadlines, failed to live up to commitments, or just plain behaved badly--and nobody steps up to the issue. Or they do, but do a lousy job and create a whole new set of problems. Accountability suffers and new problems spring up. New research demonstrates that these disappointments aren't just irritating, they're costly--sapping organizational performance by...'
Customer Reviews:
IF You Could Buy Only One Book.......2007-09-24
I read this when it was first published and then bought it for each staff member as one of our required primers. I also gave one to each of my Board members. If there is one book I wish had existed 30 years ago, this is it.
A Relational Guide to Confrontation.......2007-08-24
In this example filled guide to crucial confrontations - those times when holding someone accountable is critical to what is important to you - the authors present a relational model for what to do as you become aware of a gap between your expectations and what has or is happening in the specific situation.
The concept approaches the crucial confrontation in `before', `during', and `after' steps; requiring you to spend some `before' time deciding `what' is the specific issue to be addressed and `if' you should enter into the crucial confrontation - what do you desire out of the relationship is a key question to help identify the real issue. Also in the `before' phase, you are asked to master your emotions by considering not only `your story', but also by considering the other person's context and thus `their story' - are they really doing this because they want to fail with you? Probably not - they just have an entirely different perspective (their story) on the situation!
The `during' step requires that you confront with safety and stay with the facts; assuring the other party that mutual respect and mutual purpose are present. The `after' step requires agreement on an action plan and follow-up. Along the way, there are tools to avoid getting side-tracked, with ample examples of situations that may arise and suggestions for dealing with them. The book is recommended for anyone interested in improving any of their many relationships, business or personal.
Crucial Confrontations.......2007-06-27
A must read for supervisors and managers. With outstanding proven approaches to knowing what you want from a conversaton, what the other wants, and watching out for the relationship. Found it useful at work as a reference book, plus a great read for personal relationship communications as well. Would suggest reading Crucial Conversations first to really get the full view.
Crucial Confrontations.......2007-05-08
Excellent book. Easy directions and explanations to implement the Crucial Confrontation Model.
this is IT!.......2007-05-07
exceeded my expectations...a must read for all those seeking practical strategies to lessen the 'drama' in face-to-face accountability discussions.
Book Description
NLP skills are proving invaluable for personal development and professional excellence in counselling, education, and business.
Customer Reviews:
Not very good actually .......2007-06-11
The book presents a few ideas and techniques from the field of psychology (ie critical thinking) but , because its an introduction, does not go into any real depth. It leave the reader feeling a bit cheated really. Anyone who's really serious can get more knowledge by picking up a few college level text books in psychology and skip this introduction.
The best NLP Introduction .......2007-05-24
I consider myself a dabbler in NLP and have read several books on the topic. Perhaps, "attempted to read" might be a more accurate depiction. I found the works by Bandler and Grinder and the Andreas's very difficult to get through. At the other end of the spectrum, there are other works on NLP or NLP-related techniques that are quite readable but seem geared towards those lacking all self-esteem. This book by O'Connor and Seymour is an easy-to-read, logical, and objective overview of NLP without the claims of life-altering benefits.
For those interested in using NLP to improve communication skills and learn more about how our minds work, this book is the place to start.
Magnificent.......2005-12-29
Informative, Logically sequenced book. I loved it. I wished if it has more illustrations, styling design, and format. It would have made it even more appealling.
Outstanding.......2005-09-05
I very much wanted to get into this little known science of NLP, brainchild of Richard Bandler and John Grinder, for some time. After careful examination of similar books I chose this one after reading some of the page excerpts.
Boy am I glad I did!! This book lays a framework and gives the fundamentals to this awesome science, and does so with such grace and ease that it is mesmerising. It simply and eloquently explains how you can use your brain to it's fullest potential and how to use your senses to design ways to get what you've always wanted.
NLP - Neuro Linguistic Programming (don't be turned off by the fancy title) is simply a way of life to help you succeed. It is the language used by winners - the science and art of NLP was invented by studying what successful people do differently to everyone else; how their mindsets allowed them to succeed where others fail.
It's little wonder that this book has got 5 stars from practically everyone who has bought it. It changed my life, and if you are looking for ways to get where you want to be in life then go for it.
Great intro.......2005-09-01
This book takes you right to the core without success stories and other stuffings. Info-packed as it is, it brings you into NLP quick and effortless, describing the concepts in a clear and consistent manner. Recommended reading for all NLP starters.
Amazon.com
According to most relationship books, the key to a solid marriage is communication, communication, communication. Phooey, says John Gottman, Ph.D., author of the much-lauded Why Marriages Succeed or Fail. There's much more to a solid, "emotionally intelligent" marriage than sharing every feeling and thought, he points out--though most couples therapists ineffectively (and expensively) harp on these concepts.
Gottman, the director of the Gottman Institute, has found through studying hundreds of couples in his "love lab" that it only takes five minutes for him to predict--with 91 percent accuracy--which couples will eventually divorce. He shares the four not-so-obvious signs of a troubled relationship that he looks for, using sometimes amusing passages from his sessions with married couples. (One standout is Rory, the pediatrician who didn't know the name of the family dog because he spent so much time at work.)
Gottman debunks many myths about divorce (primary among them that affairs are at the root of most splits). He also reveals surprising facts about couples who stay together. They do engage in screaming matches. And they certainly don't resolve every problem. "Take Allan and Betty," he writes. "When Allan gets annoyed at Betty, he turns on ESPN. When Betty is upset with him, she heads for the mall. Then they regroup and go on as if nothing's happened. Never in forty-five years of marriage have they sat down to have a 'dialogue' about their relationship." While this may sound like a couple in trouble, Gottman found that they pass the love-lab tests and say honestly that "they are both very satisfied with their relationship and they love each other deeply."
Through a series of in-depth quizzes, checklists, and exercises, similar to the ones he uses in his workshops, Gottman provides the framework for coping with differences and strengthening your marriage. His profiles of troubled couples rescued from the brink of divorce (including that of Rory, the out-of-touch doctor) and those of still-happy couples who reinvigorate their relationships are equally enlightening. --Erica Jorgensen
Book Description
John Gottman has revolutionized the study of marriage by using rigorous scientific procedures to observe the habits of married couples in unprecedented detail over many years. Here is the culmination of his life's work: the seven principles that guide couples on the path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Packed with practical questionnaires and exercises,
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential.
Download Description
John Gottman has revolutionized the study of marriage by using rigorous scientific procedures to observe the habits of married couples in unprecedented detail over many years. Here is the culmination of his life's work: the seven principles that guide couples on the path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship.
Packed with practical questionnaires and exercises, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential.
"An eminently practical guide to an emotionally intelligent -- and long-lasting -- marriage."
DANIEL GOLEMAN, AUTHOR OF EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
"Gottman stays refreshingly down to earth, rather than on Mars and Venus."
BILL MARVEL AND GEOFFREY NORMAN, AMERICAN WAY
"Gottman comes to this endeavor with the best of qualifications: he's got the spirit of a scientist and the soul of a romantic."
NEWSWEEK
"Twenty-five years of landmark marital research."
USA TODAY
"Offers something every relationship can benefit from."
SEATTLE POST-INTELLIGENCER
"Astonishing new research!"
WOMAN'S WORLD
Customer Reviews:
A Fantastic Book..........2007-10-19
If I ever get married again I will keep this fantastic book closeby. For the last year I have been traveling to Seattle to train for certification with Jon and Julie Gottman and their staff at The Gottman Institute, and this book is a great introduction to their work and the invaluable research they have done with couples for more than thirty years now. I wish this book and their work were required reading for life. I wish I had known of their work earlier in my life both personally and professionally. This is a book to come back to time and time again. To me it is not only useful for married couples but has such wise tools to learn about for all our relationships. I've read most of his other books and highly recommend them as well, including those on children.
Your marriage doesn't have to be rocky to get value from this book........2007-10-18
This is NOT a self help book. I can tell you that honestly because I don't read self help books. Self help books are generalist pseudo-science made up by so-called motivational gurus like Tony Robbins, Rhonda Byrne (The Secret) and Jack Canfield (Chicken Soup guy). The aforementioned books are mental pablum written by corrupt individuals whose goal is to separate you from your money. They are not experts. Their only accomplishment is to come up with a manipulative technique to sell a new version of snake oil.
If you want to learn more on this subject, read SHAM by Steve Salerno. It isn't a perfect book because he falls down a bit in the proof area, and some of his conclusions are outlandish, but he does give you a lot to think about regarding the self help movement.
John Gottman's book is an educational reference. If you want to be a physicist, you read books by experts in the field of physics. If you want to be a good spouse, you read books on marriage by experts in the field of marriage. It's not self help; it's education.
Make sure you pick your "experts" carefully. John Gray (Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus) is NOT an expert. He got is "PhD" from a diploma mill. The man has no accredited higher education at all. His book is pure, made up, stereotypical garbage. He came up with a catchy title, went on Oprah, and made millions because there are a lot of gullible people out there. Don't be one of them.
Gottman, however, really is an expert. He is one of the best in his field and is recognized as such by his peers. His credentials are legitimate and he wrote a very good book. My marriage was good before I read it. My wife brought it home because, as a family doctor, she often talks to her patients about their relationships and this was part of her overall education. I like improving myself, so I read it too and it helped. My marriage wasn't in need of saving, but fine tuning is always a good idea, so I used the techniques and they work. It helped evolve my marriage from good to great.
I can see how it would help save marriages that were really on the rocks, although I don't have the first hand experience in this regard. What Gottman has to say really resonates about things that you should and should not do in a marriage. On that note, I think people give up on relationships too easily. They become too self absorbed, worry about their own needs and forget the joy to be had in being dedicated to making someone they love happy. Not all marriages can be fixed, but most can.
It doesn't take much to motivate me to stay married, but the one thing that terrifies me more than anything about getting divorced is the thought of some other guy being a stepfather to my children. I am very protective of my kids, and no man will EVER take my place as their father as long as I'm alive. Think about that before you sleep with your secretary.
I have one criticism of Gottman. He's an expert, and he knows it. His book comes across as arrogant, and sometimes the material is dry. Forgive me, but I like to be entertained a little. I accept that you are an expert or I wouldn't be reading your book, so you don't have to keep reminding me. The information is great, but it isn't exactly a page turner. Perhaps he should have done different male and female versions with the same content, but written in different styles. A few metaphorical car chases and explosions couldn't have hurt.
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Gu.......2007-10-15
This is a great book! I have read many relationship books and this is clearly the best. It is so easy to read and offers a lot of practical guidance. There are step by step exercises for you and your partner to work on together. Rebuilding and re-aquainting with each other. I found it to be hopeful and reassuring. It has helped me immensely in my relationship. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who is looking for help in your relationship.
A must for couples considering marriage/long-term partnership.......2007-09-30
My fiancee and I decided to be proactive and visit a psychologist before we had any relationship issues and before we got married. He recommended Gottman to us, and what a fabulous recommendation it was! Reading "Seven Principles" really illustrated with lucidity what it was about my parents' marriage that has always bothered me (contempt from my mother in their arguments) and gave clear steps on how to avoid this and other relationship killers. It was very reaffirming in that it doesn't tell couples not to fight (because how realistic is that?), but teaches them how to fight and how to agree to disagree. My fiancee is in the process of reading it now, and I'm excited for him to finish so we can talk it over. The last principle, in particular, is really great for people who already have solid relationships...it made me excited to get married!
A really excellent book overall, Gottman's writing style is clear and concise!
A must have in protecting one's marriage!.......2007-09-26
This book is absolutely essential in the treatment of marriage or couple counseling, as well as can be used by anyone interested in strengthening their own marriage/relationships. It is helpful because it is basic, layed out in a very simplistic manner, and is an easy reader. The book offers concrete instructions for couples on how to improve their closeness, connection, and communication. It is also based on scientific studies thereby offering value and effectiveness of the techniques illustrated in the book. I would highly recommend it for struggling couples, those considering divorce, as well as couples with a good relationship seeking a closer bond.
Average customer rating:
- A review of the reviews...
- Used as a book club book and it was PERFECT for that!
- Little Black Book of Connections
- Excellent book
- Great Little Black Handbook of Connections
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Little Black Book of Connections: 6.5 Assets for Networking Your Way to Rich Relationships
Jeffrey Gitomer
Manufacturer: Bard Press
ProductGroup: Book
Binding: Hardcover
Communications
| Skills
| Business & Investing
| Subjects
| Books
General
| Business Life
| Business & Investing
| Subjects
| Books
General
| Business & Investing
| Subjects
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ASIN: 1885167660 |
Book Description
People in all kinds of jobs, in big and small companies career builders, sales people, and aspiring executives will love this edgy, practical, and fun book In the spirit, style, and format of the bestselling Little Red Book of Selling, the country's #1 sa
Customer Reviews:
A review of the reviews..........2007-10-13
I can't help but respond to some of the reviews about the Little Black Book of Connections. The people who wrote bad reviews all seem to point to the fact that the book contains clever ways to get you to the author's site and register. Isn't that the point ? The first step to making a connection ? Making the first contact ?
This book is so well written, I can't believe these people read the book and that's all they can say is, "He's trying to get my information so he can sell me."
People who don't like being "sold" to, will never be able to sell. My advice to anyone considering buying this book...If you want some networking "gold" buy this book. If you don't want to be "sold" to, keep your hourly wage job and hope that Medicare and Social Security is still around when you retire broke.
Robin C Aletras
BlueWEB Media, Inc
www.bluewebmedia.com
Used as a book club book and it was PERFECT for that!.......2007-10-01
Gitomer is such a fun writer, his style and examples make you smile and laugh out loud at times. He keeps your attention and gives you great calls to action to get you doing something with what you are reading. I have read many of his books and this is a great quick read to get you going in making relationships work better for you. After you read this one, go and get Richard Abraham's book MR. SHMOOZE- The Art and Science of Selling Through Relationships to take it another level. A great investment in your personal library.
Little Black Book of Connections.......2007-09-13
This book is nothing short of a Survival Guide for people wanting to get re-employed, or improve from being underemployed. This is the guide to Networking and making connections. Don't wait, "click" now and get started to improving your life.
Excellent book.......2007-09-11
Excellent book on networking. One of the very few that will talk about giving before receiving; more than a networking book it's a book that'll teach you to build long lasting friendships. These will eventually help you move ahead in life.
Great Little Black Handbook of Connections.......2007-09-05
Jeffrey Gitomer is a professional at life. He provided many great insights into connecting and networking through a collection of lists of his own "proverbs" and altruisms. I doubt anyone can read this all at once; but the book is great when you read a few lists until you find something that really strikes you, and then practice it for a few weeks before going back to this great reference work. Very good!
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